Choosing A Mate Wisely

DISCUSSIONS WITH A close friend of mine were once dominated by her excitement and continuous expressions that she wanted to get married. She told me she had a brother in mind that captivated her with his charm, intelligence, and handsome looks. She said that he was interested in her as well. She said many things about him, but none of […]

Continue reading…

Marriage Bandits and the End of Secret Second Wives

MORE AND MORE awareness has been raised regarding the phenomenon of ‘marriage bandits’ – those men, often portraying themselves as ‘religious,’ who approach women with convincing proposals of marriage, charming them into shady arrangements resembling (barely) ḥalâl hook-ups rather than serious commitments. Shortly after, victims of these predators will find themselves used and abused, their Islamic rights disregarded, and their […]

Continue reading…

The Rights of Children Over Parents | Part 2

PSYCHOLOGISTS DEFINE THE word ‘family’ as the first group of people that a child lives and interacts with in the first years of his life. During this period the child copies his parents in their attitudes, personality, reactions to different situations, cultural practices, etc… The first and foremost job of the family is to protect the fiṭra of the child. […]

Continue reading…

The Fires of Marriage: Fire #1: Is Your Spouse Inconsiderate of Your Time?

IN OUR INTRODUCTION (“The Fires of Marriage: How to Stop Fighting With Your Spouse”) we discussed how marital conflict can be used as a tool to bring couples closer by strengthening their bond. Just as Allah’s Messenger œ mentioned that fitnah (tribulation) purifies the believer like a forge-fire purifies gold, there is perhaps no relationship that can purify a person better […]

Continue reading…

Know Thy Children

PARENTING IS BASED on the unequivocal truth that mother and father know best, whether it is for, or about, their children. If those who essentially bring us into this world are not endowed with that faculty, then who else could possibly be? But parents themselves will tell you that is a contestable fact. There was a time when they too […]

Continue reading…

Men Are Babies and Other Jokes

MEN ARE JUST babies.” “Women are so emotional.” “Your husband is your first child.” “Don’t try to understand women.” In lectures and articles, from popular Muslim speakers and well-meaning aunties, these phrases are passed on as part and parcel of marriage advice or counsel on how to deal with the opposite gender. The tone is usually light-hearted, with a knowing […]

Continue reading…

Teaching Love for the Prophet in our Families

LOVE IS LEARNED, there’s no doubt about it. And, just as racism and hate is taught by actions and words throughout a child’s life, so is love and forbearance. In our communities, there is much love for all those material things in life – houses, cars, the latest and greatest gizmos. We teach our children to crave these things…but what […]

Continue reading…

Even the Prophets Had Family Problems

ANY OF US struggle with familial relationships. Sometimes, it can be overwhelmingly lonely. But even in the most difficult of family times, remember: even the Prophets had family issues. And despite their struggles, they continued in the path of God, knowing He was with them and that they were not alone—just as we must know through our own struggles. You […]

Continue reading…

You Were a Spouse Before You Became a Parent

Escapism is officially defined as: Es·cap·ism (-skpzm) n. The tendency to escape from daily reality or routine by indulging in daydreaming, fantasy, or entertainment. *** He arrives home at 8:30 p.m, exhausted from the day’s work. As he shuts the front door gently, she hears him enter, totally engrossed in the latest plot twist of the local prime time television show. […]

Continue reading…

Successful marriage is about more than rights!

By: Abu Ibrahim Source: IslamicLearningMaterials.com Articles and books that contain the phrase “Rights of the Muslim Wife/Husband” should be banned. Those are some of the worst and destructive articles I’ve ever encountered in the English-Muslim world. This is not to say that Muslim men and women do not have rights. Of course they do. But I don’t think it’s wise for […]

Continue reading…